an answer to my own question
The whole 'why am i here? question (to a dgree) has been answered, im not sure if im satidfied with the answer.
so you know how it goes, you finish uni, you do nothing, you go on the dole, and start looking for jobs. i actullay didn't think i would ACTULLY get one, but now that i have i feel a bit.. strange.
so yeah, finding a job was part of my t hings to do over the summer, and now thati got one, its just a bit like 'oh... ok, so i got a job. quicker than i thought, but still its a job.' and it's a youth work job, which is better than summer temping!
but im not sure im entirly happy.
the job sounds great, bags of potential, but at the momment, its no St. Michelas!
maybe thats the problem, still hung up bout the St. Mikes job! i did nt even wanna come back to london, and so many people are surprised to see me, they too thought i woauld stay up there.
Something is rottern in the state of Denmark, i just can't put my finger on it!
why do i ffel this way, im am thrilled to be offered the job, can't belive i was the best out of the 8 they interviewed (well i can believe it, i am a pretty good youth worker!), but there is a pa rt of me thats like, am i actully ready for this? am i perpared to do this full time, the only one in charge of youth work, all by myself? (sorry im not looking for an ego boost or anything)
just feel .... lost..... something is not right...
oh poo.
posted by dee @ 3:34 PM
5 Comments:
where is your job? its so good that you've got one. just see how it goes, thats all you can do. it might go better than you first thought. it might not, but you don't know until you try it. it might be the best thing thats happened to you in a while. good luck hun, and i'll be thinking and praying for you.x
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Hey Dee, Congrats.
It's a craZy thing life, you never really know.... Why?
I NEVER EVER wanted to return to Neston after I graduated, however I did, (through no real choice of my own) if I hadn't though I don’t think I would be here now.
It presented me with the opportunity to put closure to stuff, and the best thing of all, I went back to uni met a whole host of randomly cool people and now I'm 'Qualified to make a difference' doing a job that I love, in the field (with the odd cow and sheep) I know I am meant to be in.
I guess the long and short of it is, ‘It’ all happened for a reason, sometimes it makes sense right away and other times it takes a while.
All the best in your job, enjoy.
Hey Dee
You are in the place God wants you to be, for the moment... I was also in the same place as you I didn't want to return to Lacaster after living in London, but it was so right for me, and now look where I am!! I was there for a season, and that might be what you have to do, just think of all the kids you will come into contact with who you can make a difference to!!
God does know what is right for you....stay cool, and keep in touch!!
miss you Dee! why no post for ages? :(
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